Monopoly: Celebrity Edition
It seems like every time a celebrity draws a card it's always Get out of Jail free. What's up with that? Is it possible that no high-profile celebrity can be properly charged and sentenced for their crimes?
O.J. Simpson. He killed two people and got away with it. Now let's just say that was my bloody footprint found on the residence. That alone would be enough to convict me and I'm 1000's of miles away from the murder scene.
Robert Blake's murder trial is being postponed. And he's out on bail right now. You heard me right. He's roaming about free. Now put me in his shoes. I'm at a Perkins with my fiancee. As we leave the restaurant I say, "Hey honey, you just head out to the car quickly. I forgot my gun at our booth." I go back in and get my gun and come out to find that my life has been shot and killed. Now what fucking sense does that story make? My bullshit tale would never hold up in court. And even if by some hellish miracle I wasn't the trigger man, no court would set me free on bail, let alone have a judge who's now postponing the murder trial.
Scott Peterson. Same deal there. Let's put it in my shoes. I'm married and cheating on my wife. So heck, I just have this need to go fishing a few hours away from the house. And sure as shit my wife turns up missing. And what do you know. They find her washed up body in the same fishing hole that I had went too. So what do I do then. I run. Run like shit. Take 10k cash, steal my brothers ID, die my hair, and take off for Mexico. Now I'm caught and standing trial. Does that sound like a case where the judge would consider throwing out? Well maybe not for me. But for lucky ole' Scott Peterson that's his situation. This guy is going to get away with murder. How and why his case became famous as opposed to many others? Beats me. In my eyes, he's a cheating fuck that just wanted to off his wife.
Lastly Martha Stewart. The ImClone founder gets 7 years in the slammer. That's quite a long time for assisting in the crime Martha committed. But what does Martha get.....5 lousy months at a facility that looks better than my own home. I just don't get it.
There's a glimmer of hope in my that I might become famous one day. And when I do, remind me to go kill someone. Apparently I can get away with it.
O.J. Simpson. He killed two people and got away with it. Now let's just say that was my bloody footprint found on the residence. That alone would be enough to convict me and I'm 1000's of miles away from the murder scene.
Robert Blake's murder trial is being postponed. And he's out on bail right now. You heard me right. He's roaming about free. Now put me in his shoes. I'm at a Perkins with my fiancee. As we leave the restaurant I say, "Hey honey, you just head out to the car quickly. I forgot my gun at our booth." I go back in and get my gun and come out to find that my life has been shot and killed. Now what fucking sense does that story make? My bullshit tale would never hold up in court. And even if by some hellish miracle I wasn't the trigger man, no court would set me free on bail, let alone have a judge who's now postponing the murder trial.
Scott Peterson. Same deal there. Let's put it in my shoes. I'm married and cheating on my wife. So heck, I just have this need to go fishing a few hours away from the house. And sure as shit my wife turns up missing. And what do you know. They find her washed up body in the same fishing hole that I had went too. So what do I do then. I run. Run like shit. Take 10k cash, steal my brothers ID, die my hair, and take off for Mexico. Now I'm caught and standing trial. Does that sound like a case where the judge would consider throwing out? Well maybe not for me. But for lucky ole' Scott Peterson that's his situation. This guy is going to get away with murder. How and why his case became famous as opposed to many others? Beats me. In my eyes, he's a cheating fuck that just wanted to off his wife.
Lastly Martha Stewart. The ImClone founder gets 7 years in the slammer. That's quite a long time for assisting in the crime Martha committed. But what does Martha get.....5 lousy months at a facility that looks better than my own home. I just don't get it.
There's a glimmer of hope in my that I might become famous one day. And when I do, remind me to go kill someone. Apparently I can get away with it.
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