My Mind News

This is my brain. I'm pretty sure it's not on drugs.

Thursday, April 29, 2004

Fat gets exiction notice.

I recall my college days when there was a thing known as "the Freshman 15". What that pretty much means is that you'll gain 15 pounds due to the overconsumption of beer and other substances that make ya pudgy. And sure enough, I saw plenty girls and guys plump out their first year. Some more than others. At the time I was still in the military, so was able to pig out and burn all that nasty stuff off.

Years later, things have changed. And I wasn't prepared for them. No one told me about the, "got a girl and now you're a lazy fuck" fat. And I'm a victim of it, and was not even aware. How'd this come to be? Why'd it take me so long to figure out what was going wrong?

Here I was last week, taking a leak and I realized something. I can't see my dick. What the heck's up with that? Maybe I'm exaggerating a bit, but looking straight down I couldn't see my manhood. I had to bend forward a few inches to catch a glimpse.

Still in utter amazement, I walked over to our full length mirror in the bedroom and I recieved my confirmation. I indeed have become a bit of a fat fuck. And I'm not pleased. And here I was critising my fiancee for her weight and I was letting myself slip as well.

So today I decided to do something about it. I've already been periodically running on the treadmill for two weeks now, but I wanted to up the scale a bit. So I decided to start doing some pushups and situps. There was a time I could do 50 of each in a single sitting and go on about my day. So how did I add up today against that?

29 situps
2 pushups

Can you believe that shit?!??! 2 stinkin' pushups!!!!

I am not a happy camper. And I won't be a content fat camper either. So this fats gotta go, and in return I'm opening occupancy for some lean muscle. So if you know of any, be sure to send it my way.

And to satisfy my ego that I think you guys actually give a hoot about my losing these excess weight and gaining my strength back, I'll be periodically posting my performance. And get that smile off your face. I'm already disgusted about those 2 tiddly pushups.

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